Friends,

 

I have previously written about a long-held principle that has shaped my life and almost everything I do: be a giver. You reap what you sow. Good karma. What goes around comes around. Call it whatever you like. It has been one of the core reasons for my happiness and success.

 

For many years, it was a mindset backed by my faith and my experience. Then I read Adam Grant’s book, Give and Take, and it also became a science. Grant spent years studying who experiences the most success in business: givers, takers, or matchers. He found that givers showed up disproportionately at the top.¹ It was inspiring to see my personal philosophy receive scientific backing!

 

Here’s an important turth I eventually realized: giving is often easy and simple…and the return on it can be wildly disproportionate to the cost. Something that takes you five minutes can change someone’s life. I think of giving like a slot machine—you put in a nickel, and $100,000 might pop out (it just may be for someone else). You just never know.

 

Four precious gifts that are “free”

Giving doesn’t have to be expensive. It doesn’t even have to be physical or monetary. In fact, four of the most valuable gifts I’ve both given and received don’t cost a cent.

 

First is the gift of knowledge: an insight, a tip, an article that shows up at exactly the right moment for someone. I send my EQ newsletter to people not because I’m trying to sell them anything, but because I found something I thought would actually help.

 

Second is the gift of attention. Real listening. It’s getting curious about someone’s pains, challenges, hopes, and dreams, not waiting for your turn to talk. This one is rarer than it should be, which is exactly why it makes such an impression when someone actually does it.

 

Third is the gift of gratitude. A note. A shout-out. Naming what someone did and telling them why it mattered. It takes two minutes, and people may remember it for years.

 

Fourth—and the one I’d call the ultimate force multiplier—is the gift of connection. Introducing two people who can have a mutually edifying conversation…and possibly relationship.

 

I call this the power law of connections. When you put the right people together, they don’t add to each other’s impact, they multiply it. I’ve watched this happen over and over throughout my life: I spend five minutes sending an introductory email, and it produces something unexpectedly valuable in the lives of both people.

 

Notice the pattern across all four of these. They are all simple and easy. It’s what Grant calls the “five-minute favor.” Something that costs you a little bit of time but can be disproportionately valuable to the person on the receiving end. Send the article, listen to someone for a few minutes, write the thank you note, make the introduction. None of these require cash or a calendar block. They involve noticing someone and acting with intention.

 

Priceless impact

I started the EQ newsletter at Amazon by sharing helpful articles with a handful of colleagues. There was no strategy or growth plan, just knowledge I thought would be helpful to others. It eventually grew to over 50,000 subscribers (the largest opt-in email list at Amazon), and I still hear from readers I’ve never met in person about what it’s meant to them. Someone emailed me about their spouse passing away and told me a piece I’d shared helped them get through it. Another told me an article gave them hope and direction to help their kid who was going through with a mental health struggle. Someone else read a newsletter the week they got laid off and said it made a big difference to their confidence. That’s the gift of knowledge, compounding in ways I never could never have predicted.

 

I have so many stories of connections producing outsized impact that I couldn’t possibly share them all. Here is one particularly cool one. I was working with Matt Kursch, CEO of Oji Life Labs, and he introduced me to Linda Hill, a Harvard professor and one of the world’s leading experts on digital innovation. I wound up interviewing Linda for an Amazon Talk and sharing her work with thousands of Amazonians. A little later, my colleague Vanessa Druskat, the world’s leading expert in team EQ, introduced me to Amy Edmondson, the Harvard researcher who coined the concept of psychological safety. I also interviewed Amy for an Amazon Talk, and had an amazing conversation. To this day, I quote both of them in every EQ session I give on innovation and transformation.

 

Then two AWS colleagues and friends, Jana Werner and Phil Le-Brun, reached out for insights for a book they were writing, The Octopus Organization. After they interviewed me, they asked if I knew anyone else who could speak about innovation and psychological safety. Naturally, I connected them with Linda and Amy, and their expertise made a signicant impact on the book. (They also have an amazing Substack called Ink Tank. I highly recommend subscribing!) It’s now winning all sorts of book awards and taking the world by storm.

 

And it all started with two colleagues deciding that a five-minute introduction was worth making.

 

Use it Monday morning

Pick one person who could benefit from one of these four gifts. Send them the article. Ask about their actual challenge and then just listen. Write the “thank you” note you’ve been meaning to send. Or better yet, connect two people in your network who have no idea how much they could benefit each other.

Give a free gift. That’s the ask. Then watch the magic happen.

 

Be EPIQ,

Rich

 

¹Givers also showed up disproportionately at the bottom. The key factor: givers need to take care of themselves to succeed. If they give to their own detriment and neglect their own needs and goals, they will be the least successful.)